I don’t let people in. I don’t like women/men. Women are bitches/Only men understand me. Men aren’t emotional enough/Only women understand me. All my friends are of the opposite sex. They just ‘get’ me better. I don’t trust… not even a little bit. I’ve written about this topic at least a hundred different ways but [...]

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I’m an avid poet and poetry reader. Really can’t be one without the other.  However sometimes I run across words that chill me to the core.  That delineate … “what it was like” for this drunk/dope fiend (thankfully in recovery today).  This young woman did this for me. And the gods (whomsoever those may be [...]

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I’m not a joiner.  I really don’t think like most people do… never have.  Rarely have I fit in with people “all the way”. Always just a smidge remains hidden to be “acceptable”.  I’m sure lots have felt that way.  Have heard it a time or twenty … I’m ‘unique’.  In the context of drinking/using, [...]

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We in the recovery world talk an awful lot about the progression of the disease. The fall into sickness. The doom and gloom of “what it was like and what happened”.  More often than not, in the thousands of meetings I’ve been to in my recovery lifetime, most ‘leads’ or speaker meetings focus an awful [...]

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Hopefully by now in your recovery process you’ve at least ‘heard’ of these nasty little buggers that can destroy an addict/alcoholic faster than anything else.  (you know “number one offender” and all that jazz? No? It’s in the book. Both of em. Yep.)  Mirriam and Webster what say you? re·sent·ment noun \ri-ˈzent-mənt\ Definition of RESENTMENT [...]

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As my good pal and a personal hero,  Al Einstein said, “The definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results”.  This goes in the annals of recovery phrase-isms as well … keep drinking/using and expecting somehow-someway-somewhere it’s going to get better. Using every superhuman power at our [...]

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I. Write. It’s what I do. My “thing”. My outlet. My fingers bleed ink. Now and again I write something that expresses the struggle of challenging my addictive mind.  This is called … sanctum. spherical magic swirling profundity perception essence clouded clarifier edification necessity blurred messages internally abound blocking sparkling incandescence. elusive contentment self stimulated [...]

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I saw an epic quote the other day. Of course I can’t remember it verbatim but the gist was something like this… We’re always waiting for the next big thing to happen or to ‘get over’ whatever problem we’re having now.  Thinking that when ‘this or that’ happens life will really take off. What we [...]

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My day started like any other at work. And then he strolled in. “He” being a man who I’d always talked to, been drawn to, for one reason or another.  Funny with a twinge of sadness hiding behind eyes that were just dying for someone to listen. For some reason he spilled it … today. [...]

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Most recovering people, unless you’ve been living under a rock – which is entirely possible for an alcholic/addict … has heard the term “self fulfilling prophecy”.  Phrase coiner Robert Merton in his book Social Theory and Social Structure defines this as … The self-fulfilling prophecy is, in the beginning, a false definition of the situation [...]

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