I Love Recovery » Video

celebrity exemption

sassysobergirl — Wed, 03 Aug 2011 23:03:53 +0000

The fact is that most alcoholics, for reasons yet obscure, have lost the power of choice in drink. Our so-called will power becomes practically nonexistent. My powerlessness over alcohol does not cease when I quit drinking. In sobriety I still have no choice—I can’t drink. The choice I do have is to pick up and use the “kit of spiritual tools” (Alcoholics Anonymous, p. 25). When I do that, my Higher Power relieves me of my lack of choice—and keeps me sober one more day. If I could choose not to pick up a drink today, where then would be my need for AA or a Higher Power?

Reprinted with permission of AA World Service

I’ve written several articles on celebrity addiction over the years. Emphatically, I believe that addiction in the media is used as a three ring circus to promote ratings. Rubberneckers of misfortune for sickness. It sickens me. It promotes stigma and misunderstanding and judgments that most people simply know nothing about. What saddens me even more is when alcoholics and addicts themselves have no compassion for the poor unfortunates who die from this illness; or more importantly the ones who still suffer.

So I got my knickers twisted. Or rather should I say … my issues with the stigma surrounding addiction were tripped. That’s not a bad thing. If we don’t support each other and help to educate the world … then statements like GaGa’s (listed below) will continue to be misunderstood. I don’t personally care for the GaGa chick all that much, but her compassion for an alcoholic… it touched me.

I read an interesting article today in Addiction Magazine about Lady GaGa commenting on Amy Winehouse passing away. Her words were this:

“She’s really special. She just gave me a lot of hope and she deserved a lot better than what people gave her.

And I hope that the world learns a lesson from this. I really hope they do. Because it’s not her lesson to learn – it’s the world’s.”

Lady Gaga on Amy Winehouse (Lady Gaga Says Amy Winehouse Deserved Better, http://www.rollingstone.com/music/news/exclusive-lady-gaga-says-amy-winehouse-deserved-better-20110802 (Retrieved 8/02/11 at 4:17 pm)

As a writer/blogger/social networking diva/recovering alcoholic … I’ve heard multitudes bash Amy Winehouse for having the same illness as I do. It hurts. It hurts because it’s misunderstood. Whether or not you believe it … alcoholism/addiction is a disease. Classified by the AMA in the same category of diseases as heart disease and cancer. Chronic, progressive, primary, and fatal. We have an illness that tells us we don’t have one. Addicts and alcoholics perpetuate the stereotype of “choice” as badly as normies. (i despise that word btw) Is it just as easy as “stop it” or “here’s help so take it stupid”. I think not.

It takes what it takes. Sometimes it takes our life.

To go against what recovery programs as well as the entire medical community tells me about addiction by making it “a moral issue”? Well I’m not buying it. She was sick and suffering. Just because she was a celebrity doesn’t mean she was any less deserving of compassion. Plenty of drunks under the bridge or addicts traveling from shooting gallery to shooting gallery are just as bad if not worse. Gaga got one thing right. The world needs to learn a lesson. Addicts aren’t BAD. We’re sick. WE. I am Amy. Amy was me. Unless and until the world views addiction as an illness there will be stigma. If she died of cancer because of refusing chemotherapy for whatever reason … we’d not be having this “moral” dilemma.

Always ALWAYS ALL WAYS … have compassion for the sick and suffering. And those of you who think it’s all about “choices”? Well that’s simply the way you feel about you. Bad people don’t get “good”. Sick people, however, CAN get better. Now that I can “differentiate the true from the false” (Alcoholics Anonymous Dr’s Opinion) I can see the true nature of my illness; before then? Well I was just refusing “rehab” because you can’t make a worthless piece of crap shine. Now I know better; now it’s my choice to work the steps. I’m still powerless over alcohol/drugs but now that I’m sober – now that I’m out of DENIAL I can make the choice; to jump in the middle of recovery and give it everything I got.

The Addiction Magazine article Going Gaga got me fired up… obviously. Stigma kills people like us. Celebrities are not exempt from compassion… not even a little bit.

live like we’re dying – Kris Allen

sassysobergirl — Sun, 20 Dec 2009 22:06:36 +0000

Sometimes we fall down and can’t get back up
We’re hiding behind skin that’s too tough
How come we don’t say I love you enough
Till it’s to late, it’s not too late

Our hearts are hungry for a food that won’t come
We could make a feast from these crumbs
And we’re all staring down the barrel of a gun
So if your life flashed before you
What would you wish you would’ve done

Yeah… gotta start
Lookin at the hand of the time we’ve been given here
This is all we got and we gotta start pickin it
Every second counts on a clock that’s tickin’
Gotta live like we’re dying

We only got
86 400 seconds in a day to
Turn it all around or throw it all away
We gotta tell ‘em that we love ‘em
While we got the chance to say
Gotta live like we’re dying

And if your plane fell out of the skies
Who would you call with your last goodbyes
Should be so careful who we live out our lives
So when we long for absolution
There’ll no one on the line

We only got
86 400 seconds in a day to
Turn it all around or throw it all away
We gotta tell ‘em that we love ‘em
While we got the chance to say
Gotta live like we’re dying

Like we’re dying oh – like we’re dying [x2]

We only got
86 400 seconds in a day to
Turn it all around or throw it all away
We gotta tell ‘em that we love ‘em
While we got the chance to say
Gotta live – like we’re dying

We never know a good thing till it’s gone
You never see a crash until it’s head on
All those people right when we’re dead wrong
You never know a good thing till it’s gone

Yeah… gotta start
Lookin at the hand of the time we’ve been given here
This is all we got and we gotta start livin it
Every second counts on a clock that’s tickin’
Gotta live like we’re dying

We only got
86 400 seconds in a day to
Turn it all around or throw it all away
We gotta tell ‘em that we love ‘em
While we got the chance to say
Gotta live like we’re dying

Like we’re dying oh – like we’re dying [x2]

We only got
86 400 seconds in a day to
Turn it all around or throw it all away
We gotta tell ‘em that we love ‘em
While we got the chance to say
Gotta live like we’re dying
Live like we’re dying

Song of the Day 11/09: The Red Jumpsuit Apperatus- Your Guardian Angel

admin — Tue, 10 Nov 2009 15:52:14 +0000

Song of the Day 11/2: Imogen Heap- Hide and Seek

admin — Fri, 06 Nov 2009 01:10:53 +0000

Addiction & 90210, Yes I Watch It.

admin — Wed, 04 Nov 2009 20:04:12 +0000

When I was growing up Beverly Hills 90210 was one of my favorite shows. Even though the kids were rich and spoiled, as I became a teenager I related to a lot of things on the show. Evidently I still do, and with the new version of 90210 that hit the boob tube last year, the aspect of true teenage struggle is still there. Within the first episodes of the series premier the character Adriana, portrayed by Jessica Lowndes, struggles with the disease of addiction. From pill popping to snorting lines, the character really falls into the worst of it during the first season. With the help of her friends, after she overdoses and nearly dies she enters a rehab.

Where most shows go wrong after this, 90210 did it right. Adriana’s addiction didn’t just end with a trip to rehab. There is talking of attending meetings in nearly every episode where there is a main storyline for Adrianna. When the second season begins, we see a fresh faced, new hair Adrianna who really seems to be working a program. Soon after an old flame gets in the middle of her relationship with her boyfriend, her recovery is on the brink. After attempting to win her ex back, she fails and relapses and begins another downward spiral into her using.

That is where we are left off up until this point. It is not so much that this is the first show to really follow the life of an addict, but this is a prime-time, teenage centered drama that depicts the lives of the rich and spoiled Beverly Hills High students. There is a stigma that still exists today that drug addicts are broke, homeless, junkies who live on the streets and steal everything from everyone. With the portrayal of Adrianna as a well off, talented, beautiful girl who suffers from the addiction, the reality of the disease is made concrete. I relate to this girl, not so much the outside, but the inside. The feelings of desperation, and pressure from her family, and her ability to just not stop until its that bad is everything I have gone through in my addiction.

The relapse and need for meetings is portrayed so perfectly that you almost forget she is this beautiful starlet who was almost dead and using when pregnant in the first season. When she is upset, her best friends know that she needs a meeting. The support shown throughout the show that this is a real disease that does not discriminate is surprising. Many shows on TV have characters that struggle with a drug problem, but unless it is a drug addiction specific show, usually the characters return back to normal life.

Even if you think of 90210 as a snobby, over dramatic show that doesn’t portray real high school students, it does. Maybe not in looks, or in every storyline, but in Adrianna’s case the depiction of an addict is so real. It is refreshing to know that there are people who are not afraid to talk about addiction as a disease and show the world that it is real and can be anyone.

Song of the Day 11/02:City & Colour- Casey’s Song

admin — Wed, 04 Nov 2009 02:02:06 +0000

Song of the Day 11/1: Fergie- Big Girls Don’t Cry

admin — Mon, 02 Nov 2009 17:39:36 +0000

This song reminds me of the goodbye letter I wrote to my drug of choice when I was in treatment. It is not only saying goodbye to a drug, but it becomes your lover almost. Fergie struggled with addiction the crystal meth and this song is about escaping a relationship with her boyfriend that she used with. It like is all those feelings I felt when I first came into the rooms.

Song of the Day 10/30:The Used- I’m A Fake

admin — Fri, 30 Oct 2009 21:18:53 +0000

Song of the Day 10/29: Relient K- Who I am Hates Who I’ve Been

admin — Thu, 29 Oct 2009 20:54:09 +0000

My Best Friend Mal & the Song of the Day 10/22: Pink- Who Knew?

admin — Fri, 23 Oct 2009 13:56:47 +0000

This song describes my life perfectly at one point in time. Even know I relate to it. About two years ago, my best friend, and sometimes love interest, Mallory overdosed and died at my house. I was the one who found her. That event was probably the most traumatizing and hardest thing emotionally, that I have had to deal with up until this point in my life. After Mal died, I stayed clean for about two months, then I much like many of us, though I could just drink and smoke pot. I promised myself for her that I would never do anything else. Well the funny thing about being an addict is that most promises are broken thanks to our disease. I soon began a downward spiral that lead me to my worst bottom, on the one year anniversary of her death. Broken, desperate, and alone, I sat in a jail cell on the anniversary crying, heartbroken, and pleading for God to either kill me or give me some guidance. I felt such guilt for her death. My disease and just the situation made me feel like I was responsible. Why didn’t I check on her sooner? Why didn’t I notice her breathing was shallow? Why when I thought something was not right did I not do anything? When I entered treatment last year two days after her anniversary, I realized I had to deal with this, and accept this as God’s will, because if I didn’t it was going to kill me.

This song is one that always seems to come on when I need it. It is much like when I am struggling with something and I go to a meeting, and the topic is just what I needed to hear. This song describes our relationship. Mallory and I used together, we were like a mixture of storms and both of our diseases brought us to a dark place, where it was going to be me or her. Sometimes I hate that it was her, but God needed her there and me here. Today I stay clean for me, but also for Mal. She was the first person in my life who taught me how to actually look at myself and like myself. We shared stories, and feelings, and in the end we both just wanted to be loved. She impacted my life in so many ways, and now that I am in recovery, I honor her life by staying clean and working steps and continuing to live this beautiful life. I sometimes can’t believe that it happened. I forget sometimes. Thanks to steps and meetings I am now able to celebrate her life, not mourn her death. I have acceptance that this is what was meant to be, and if I try to fight it, I will just get caught up in the ugliness of the disease.

And I keep your memory, you visit me in my sleep. My darling, who knew?