Damien lives near Annapolis, MD, USA. He graduated from the Pennsylvania State University with a B.A. in English. In the late nineties he began working at an ISP and taught himself how the internet worked. He has spent the past 18 years working IP networking. He loves to cook and eat. He also enjoys photography, art, and music. Damien has a loving wife and son. He blogs at soberboots.org and goes by the handle @soberboots on Twitter. Damien got sober on 9/23/2015.

I Don’t Need To Understand – By Damien D.

Grant that I may not so much seek To be consoled as to console, To be understood as to understand, To be loved as to love; For it is in giving that we receive;  It is in pardoning that we are pardoned;  It is in dying to self that we are born to eternal life. One morning last spring, after dropping my son off at school I ran into K on the soccer field as we walked toward our cars.  “How’s it going?”….I asked. She stopped and looked at me, half a smile formed….then dissolved. “Honestly?” she started, “It sucks.  Everything sucks.” Tears welled up in her eyes and I saw the rawness of her pain – nerve endings exposed to cold air kind of raw.  It had been about two weeks since the funeral and I knew she needed a shoulder to cry on. So, I offered her my… Continue reading

AA Language – Does it Help or Hinder Recovery?

“My name is Damien, and I’m an alcoholic.” This is the conventional way to introduce oneself at a meeting of the fellowship. It bugs me. The very first time I said these words they were incredibly powerful and liberating — when I finally said them, my surrender was complete. But as my sober time increases, I’m growing more uncomfortable with saying these words. They’re not inaccurate. These words defined my drinking in the end. The Merriam-Webster dictionary defines alcoholic as “affected with alcoholism” and alcoholism as “continued excessive or compulsive use of alcoholic drinks.” But these words do not define me. These words focus on the problem rather than the solution. Every time I introduce myself at a meeting, I struggle with how to label myself. I wrestle with a few phrases in my head, more often than not, I default to using these words even though they irritate me.… Continue reading