Can I Be Grateful For The Shit In My Life? – By Tsgoyna Tanzman


I lay in bed at 5:27 a.m. setting my intention for the day.

How about a Thanksgiving twist?

This Thanksgiving I’ll be grateful for the shit in my life.

Reasoning if I could be grateful for the shit, being grateful for the gifts would be Thanksgiving on steroids.

Intention set, I got out of bed stumbling barefooted in the darkness toward the bathroom. My foot came down on something warm, soft and mushy.

Wait, that did not just happen.

Note to self, when setting intentions be very specific about language.

Yes, I had just stepped in my first gift of the morning.

“Whaddya grateful for now?”

I admit it’s much easier to be philosophical while warm in bed, than on-the- spot grateful with warm crap between my toes.

Why was I grateful for stepping in poop?

  1. My feet were cold and the sensation of stepping in something warm and soft was actually nice for a second.
  2. Stepping in poop meant I had a dog.
  3. I loved my dog. I know I’m much better at unconditionally loving my dog than any other being.  I don’t harbor long-standing grudges or anger toward her. I get mad, clean it up and move on.
  4. I like practicing unconditional love. It reminds me of how I can practice with people I care deeply about and how much more love and fullness I have when I direct my energy towards love and forgiveness.
  5. Finally, I was grateful I was fully awake and alert (a morning ritual that usually takes longer)

Yeah, well that’s just a little crap, I hear you saying, “What about the big things like financial crap and health challenges.”

I periodically do a dumpster dive and though I never say, “Bring on the crap,” if I seriously look for the gifts I find them.

For example, what was the gift of losing approximately 75% of our net worth in 2008? I developed a practice of faith, not just the emergency call to God when life was falling apart.  I was grateful for the deep friendships that surfaced and floated like buoys in a stormy sea. I gained a paradigm shift about wealth and abundance and resilience.

Health challenges have brought out my inner resources of strength and self care enabling me to heal and share my wisdom.

Relationship crap has forced me to look inward and examine my side–still an ongoing process.

Crap is the fertilizer of our life’s experience and as long as you’re planting something, your garden will grow.

So what is the crap you’re grateful for?

Who has this allowed you to become? What super powers did you discover you possessed? Who are you still becoming?

Make Believe~Make Belief Affirmation:  Today I find gratitude in all my life’s challenges. I believe what is happening to me is happening for me.


About Tsgoyna Tanzman

For more than 20 years, Tsgoyna has been coaching a broad range of people, including those who’ve suffered traumatic brain injuries and catastrophic life events as well as healthy, smart, successful people who’ve been derailed or feel stuck. She likes to say, “You don’t have to have a brain injury to damage your brain, we do that with our limiting thoughts and negative beliefs.” Tsgoyna is an expert at helping women learn to coach themselves, so they can redefine and recreate their lives from an integrated, empowered and joyful state. She teaches women the tools and strategies to separate circumstances from thoughts & feelings, while gaining insight and choice into the actions they take. She supports women in releasing emotional baggage and limiting beliefs, setting goals and taking action to achieve them. Tsgoyna knows about addiction, codependence, alcoholism and the daily process of working a program as her husband is celebrating 25 years of sobriety since the intervention she arranged. Tsgoyna is a Speech/Language Pathologist, MA/CCC, Certified Life Coach, Mental Emotional Release® Therapist, Master Practitioner of Neurolinguistic Programming and a Certified Hypnotherapist. Additionally, she achieved a Level II certification in E.F.T (Emotional Freedom Technique). She has also been guest writer with 9 published pieces at the online magazine MORE.COM as well as having 15 stories published in Chicken Soup for the Soul ( in 15 different anthologies).
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