What Do You Love About Yourself? Or Like? Okay, Maybe Don’t Hate? – By Tsgoyna Tanzman

to love oneselfWhat’s Something You Love About Yourself? Or Like? Okay, maybe, Don’t Hate?

“Everyone’s a genius. But if you judge a fish by its ability to climb a tree, it will live its whole life believing it is stupid.” (unknown author mistakenly attributed to Einstein)

You’re a winner. Your very existence means you’ve won the lottery of life. The Spermatozoa Superlotto. The DNA Jackpot. Gifted with unique strengths and a set of spanking fingerprints to make your mark. Yet, we often focus on what we don’t like:

Our thighs are too thick, our nose is too long, or too short or crooked. We’re too old, too young, too fat, too thin. Blah blah blah

Beyond those visible features, marked and measured, are the invisible ones. Our energetic gifts. Our disposition. Our generosity. Our humor. Our determination. Our creativity. Our compassion. Our inquisitiveness.

What does it take for us to love ourselves in the way we want others to love us?


When you appreciate something and focus on it, you can watch it grow. What you appreciate appreciates.

ap·pre·ci·ate [əˈprēSHēˌāt]


  • recognize the full worth of: 
”she feels that he does not appreciate her”
synonyms: value treasure · admire · respect · hold in high regard · [more]
  • rise in value or price: 
”they expected the house to appreciate in value”
synonyms: increase · gain · grow · rise · go up · escalate · soar ·

This isn’t always easy to do, especially if you believe self-appreciation is self–indulgent, even narcissistic. But understanding your value and worth is how you bring yourself into the world. Les Brown talked about a woman he coached. The woman described herself as dirty, disgusting and worthless. He took a $100 bill, wadded it up, rolled it in the mud, dumped cigarette ashes on it, and stomped on it. He plucked the disgusting wadded up mess from the mud, held it up to her and asked , “Is this still worth $100?  Did it lose its value?”

What does it take for us to find our own value and recognize our own worth? Pick something you love about yourself, okay like, okay maybe don’t hate. Does something come easily to you?

Often we dismiss the easy thing as if it doesn’t count.

It counts.

What is something you have, do, or are, that seems so natural you can’t believe it’s special? Name it and claim it. Appreciate it. Want what you have. Appreciation is like fertilizer it will make anything grow.

What visible or invisible feature will you beam your light on?

Make Believe ~Make Belief Affirmation:  


I appreciate and value my________________________ . I’m a one of a kind treasure.





About Tsgoyna Tanzman

For more than 20 years, Tsgoyna has been coaching a broad range of people, including those who’ve suffered traumatic brain injuries and catastrophic life events as well as healthy, smart, successful people who’ve been derailed or feel stuck. She likes to say, “You don’t have to have a brain injury to damage your brain, we do that with our limiting thoughts and negative beliefs.” Tsgoyna is an expert at helping women learn to coach themselves, so they can redefine and recreate their lives from an integrated, empowered and joyful state. She teaches women the tools and strategies to separate circumstances from thoughts & feelings, while gaining insight and choice into the actions they take. She supports women in releasing emotional baggage and limiting beliefs, setting goals and taking action to achieve them. Tsgoyna knows about addiction, codependence, alcoholism and the daily process of working a program as her husband is celebrating 25 years of sobriety since the intervention she arranged. Tsgoyna is a Speech/Language Pathologist, MA/CCC, Certified Life Coach, Mental Emotional Release® Therapist, Master Practitioner of Neurolinguistic Programming and a Certified Hypnotherapist. Additionally, she achieved a Level II certification in E.F.T (Emotional Freedom Technique). She has also been guest writer with 9 published pieces at the online magazine MORE.COM as well as having 15 stories published in Chicken Soup for the Soul ( in 15 different anthologies).
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  1. Wow! Lovely and thought provoking! Thanx.

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