A Message Of Hope From An Addicts Mom

eye-940641_1280September has been coined National Recovery month, and I’m wanting to sound my horn, shout out from the hills, and set off fireworks, now, and each February 12th.

This February will be TEN years for which my daughter, Amanda, has been in recovery! Recovery from all drugs and alcohol. Ten years of a peaceful, rewarding life for her, and her family. And for me.

It hasn’t always been like this though, as there were ten long and grueling years prior to this tranquility and joy, whereby I thought nearly every day, that I’d lose her. Well meaning friends saying I needn’t worry, that she’d outgrow it. Me, scared sleepless, fearing the worst.

At the sweet young age of 14, my daughter was tempted by the evil hand of a fate so cruel, so dehumanizing, so frightening. Drugs of almost any kind, and alcohol entered her not fully grown mind, and body, torturing her. Torturing me. Amanda didn’t seem to know how to handle any of it, nor did I.

We lived in a continual state of pandemonium. Daily arguments ensued. Slamming doors, and running away. Once as far as Georgia, necessitating her father to travel from Connecticut, to bring my baby girl home.

Our words became vile. There was no longer peace at home, within our family, or in my mind.
There were emergency room visits, arrests, courtrooms and juvenile centers.

Yes, I tried all the conventional methods for teenage recovery and behavioral issues. In and out patient facilities. Tough love meetings, as well as any 12 step meeting I could locate.

It was a difficult time. The path was not lit. No directions. It was beyond awful. It was horrific for me, and for my darling daughter, clinging to her last threads of childhood, all the while, her mind was on auto, swaying her towards destruction.

I was losing my daughter.

High school came and went. As did her college years.

Had my daughter grown into a semi functioning addict? Obtaining her GED, securing job after job. Becoming engaged to be married, then pregnant.

Amanda gave birth to my first grandchild, the love of my life. Born days after my own mothers passing. In a huge sense, he saved me.

Although my daughter’s addiction continued after his birth, a new level of destruction was upon us. She was a mother now. Amanda’s marriage was troubled from day one, and soon dissolved.

Her once child/adolescent life had turned into one of a young woman, and a mom. Amanda was unable to handle all this. She was unable to handle anything. Things spiraled downward until my sisters passing ( late stage chronic alcoholism).

It was shortly after this sad event that my daughter approached me, requesting help for her addiction. A dream come true for an addicts mom, although we remained walking a tightrope of fear.

Amanda persevered. She worked at her detox and recovery. She resided at a treatment center, which was not posh. Meals and cleaning services were not provided. It was tough love at its finest, just what Amanda needed to recover.

Upon discharge, she worked the program with a vengeance. Daily NA or AA meetings. A psychiatrist, and therapy. She sought gainful employment, accepting a position at a five star resort, but the position was entry level. She worked in room service. More tough love, imposed by herself.

This February, my daughter will have achieved TEN years in recovery. She has created a wonderful life for herself and her family. She has two amazing children, (she’s a super mom), and an awesome husband to share her life.

Amanda has pursued a career in the addiction field, and has grown within its structure. She has worked diligently at her career, and has reaped the rewards. She is soon to graduate with a Bachelors of Science degree in Alternative Medicine.

Amanda has also schooled in Ashtanga Yoga, and has worked as an instructor. She subscribes to healthy living, as evidenced by her diet and fitness. She continues with 12 step meetings as an integral part of her life, and surrounds herself with other loving souls in recovery.

She is an active part of her community, and she loves assisting others in the path towards recovery.

My daughter is a marvel.

My daughter is loved.

My daughter is alive.

 

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About Magnolia New Beginnings

Magnolia New Beginnings, Inc. is dedicated to advocating for those affected with the disease of addiction, creating educational opportunities to inform and raise awareness about substance abuse, and supporting addicts and their families in the process of seeking recovery, maintaining sobriety, and reaching their highest potential through a new beginning. Magnolia New Beginnings has no paid staff, no overhead aside from minor administrative costs such as postage, website etc.., which allows all donations to go to the intended purpose; raising awareness and helping to create new beginnings for those affected by the disease of addiction. We strive to create a united voice among advocacy groups in order to create change. Check out Magnolia on their facebook page https://www.facebook.com/groups/beforethepetalsfall/ and website http://www.magnolianewbeginnings.org/
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7 Comments

  1. Nice post. I was checking continuously this phorum and I am impressed! Extremely helpful info particularly the last part I care for such info much. I was looking for this certain information for a long time. Thank you and best of luck. https://www.zotero.org/groups/sherwood10maxwell617

  2. I can remember when Amanda was given time to go model at a young age by her school since she was ,pretty much, a straight ”A” student from what I recall . I remember things started to change at that time. So sorry we lost touch and I couldn’t be there for you during your living hell . I can’t imagine the pain of a mother watching her beautiful daughter choose a life that could have killed her at any moment. To see her photos on facebook & what a wonderful mother, wife,daughter,& sister she has become makes me so happy for you all. So many addiction stories have a bad ending but this is a story of triumph & I’m sure helps others going through the same thing. Thank you for sharing this with everyone .

    • Thank the Tina. Unfortunately I didn’t choose addiction, as it is a disease it chose me. I also decided after years of destruction that I would no longer allow it to hold me down. It was time to live not kill myself any longer

  3. Thanks for sharing that message of hope and joy. It’s so good, in one’s own recovery, to get the lift of a ‘success’ story such as Amanda. I’m so glad that you and she found the path back to happiness. Suddenly this Tuesday seems a little bit sweeter. Thanks.

  4. Thank you so much for sharing this. I am the mother of a recovering heroin addict. Lots of what you described fits our story to a tee many miles away. Reading your story made me realise I am not alone and that a little bit of hope is a powerful thing indeed. She is now 1 year and 4 months clean, doing regular meetings and doing as much service as she can to help others. Thank you again – you touched my heart.

    • Thank you! When I read my moms story it amazes me all of the blessings and miracles we have in our life today! Hugs and prayers for your daughter!
      -Amanda Marino

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