• Past Articles

A Sober Mom’s Guide to Recovery By Rosemary O’Connor – Spirituality is for People who have already been to Hell – Review By Jackie Stein

In the rooms of Alcoholics Anonymous, a familiar refrain is that religion is for those who are afraid of Hell and spirituality is for people who have already been there. I am here to tell you that no truer words have been said. Most people who walk through the doors of AA or NA have been to Hell and back at least once and know first-hand what the depths of this disease can portend. We come to this program with many different hopes and dreams. Some are looking for a safe way to drink. Some are looking for a magic potion to take away the desire to drink. Almost all have come with a desire to feel better and failing that, to feel at all. When we get to Step Two, after having taken the step to acknowledge that we are powerless over the next drink and that our lives… Continue reading

If You Want To Be Honest Keep Seeking – By Nicola O’Hanlon

It is my experience that we can only be as honest and truthful as the limits of our knowledge and experience allows us to be. Richard Phillips Feynman, an American theoretical physicist said “It is impossible to find an answer which someday will not be found to be wrong.” Oh how many times has this rang true for me. When I reflect on my 41 years and 9 months on this planet the contradictions I unearthed in some of my deepest belief systems at certain points in my life, have been quite phenomenal. Once upon a time I believed that the Adam and Eve story was a real actual event. Naturally being raised in a Christian society you’re told that the Bible is the word of God and so you accept it. I raised my 10 year old eyebrow to the moon in disgust, when I discovered that this was a… Continue reading

Sex Addiction Recovery: Tips on Using Your Sexual Boundary Plan Robert Weiss LCSW, CSAT-S

In my previous posting to this site I outlined the creation of a sexual boundary plan that recovering sex addicts can use as a guide to not only avoiding problem behaviors, but to living a healthy and happy life in sobriety. In this posting I will give a few tips on how to most effectively implement these plans, once you’ve got one. Turn Your Plan into a Contract Sexual boundary plans are intended to define sexual sobriety while also giving you a plan for a better life moving forward. If you are truly serious about recovery, add language at the bottom of your boundary plan saying you agree to not engage in inner boundary behaviors, to be careful with middle boundary items, and to live in the outer boundary to the best of your ability. And then sign the document, turning it into a contract. After it is signed you… Continue reading

What’s In Your Blind Spot? – By Tsgoyna Tanzman

It was 5:15am. I awoke to the sound of my husband yelling up the stairs. “My car’s blocked and I need to leave now.”  I raced for the keys, jumped in my daughter’s car and without adjusting the seat or mirrors, began the 8 or 9 maneuvers to get out of the tight, narrow tricky garage. My goal was get out of his way as fast as I could. Backup turn, go forward, turn again, back up, turn. It’s an inch-by-inch process and the walls are scarred, dinged and scraped by anyone not willing to respect the angles or focus needed to leave unscathed. Finally, I executed the last turn toward the exit. Scrape. I hit the wall on the right rear side above the tire. My blind spot. I was so convinced I was clear; yet there it was. Despite my best efforts I hit the wall. Blind spots are the things… Continue reading

Parenthood – by Andrew Ahmad Cooke

“Parenthood remains the greatest single preserve of the amateur.” Alvin Toffler My daughter is everything to me. Smudge is now ten years old. Being her father has brought meaning to my life. Parenthood is a certain role in an uncertain universe. One of the most wonderful things about my recovery is the transformation of our relationship. We have always been very close but my behaviour in my descent into heavy addiction scared her at times, or should I say often. Towards the end she did not want to be left alone with me, whenever my wife did try to get out for an evening she would be tearfully begged not to go; once when she was on a day out in London with her mother, she didn’t even want to come home. The fear of not knowing what state they would find me in was becoming ingrained in both of… Continue reading