• Past Articles

Meeting People Where They Are At – By Kyczy Hawk

A time of reflection. A time to cast the mind forward and the glance backward. A time to reset my intentions and to consider where my intentions have fallen by the wayside. How have my actions missed the mark? I am good with the practical, with the mundane, even with the technical. But relationships… they can trip me up. I am a recovering codependent. I have a weakness for otheration. When slightly stressed, when emotions run high, when my tank runs empty I fall into bad habits. I even fall into the habit of thought that “I should be better than this, I should be better by now, I should, I should, I should.” I am even codependent with my expectations of myself. (More on this later.) I have some tools to use when I am in a difficult relationship. These relationship difficulties can arise due to my own shortcomings,… Continue reading

SECRETS

    Some as precious and spectacular as rubies some as ominous and treacherous as fools gold whether dark or light each sticks to our bones and falsifies our essence. Some sparkle in fantastic splendour memories of stolen moments of joy, passion, mischief. Afraid to let them escape from our depths in case the feeling ends in case it wasn’t true caressing them like a twin flame we nurture what is only ours to know what seems sacred. Yet horror lurks there still, you drink it down try to poison it. Its ugliness wants to stare you in the face it screams it bites it hurts and tries to smother you and you wreathe in anguish as it refuses to give you peace moulding you with its fear enforcing its identity upon you it snuffs out the light bringing you to the brink of insanity. So thickly are you covered… Continue reading

My Very First Meeting – By Alana Haase

I had mentioned some time ago, that I would post about my first twelve step meeting. I’ve gotten a lot of requests to tell on myself since then. My behavior is a source of hilarity to me NOW but at the time… Well, let’s just say I was a little bit nuclear bomb angry, fearful and living in a cloud of constant anxiety. I did not go to that meeting of my own free will. One of my dearest friends had finally grabbed me by both shoulders and told me, “If you do not go to that meeting tonight I will come get you, duct tape your fanny to the bumper of my car and DRAG you there!” I could tell by the flashing of her brilliant blue eyes that she meant business. She was done with the never-ending nonsense caused by the chaos in my life. Her knee’s were… Continue reading

How Many Likes Are Enough? – By Andrea Wachter, LMFT

As a therapist who enjoys writing, several years ago I decided to hop on the blogging bandwagon. Having received a moderate number of likes and positive feedback, it seemed for a while that nobody was worse for the wear and maybe a few people even benefited. Then came the day when one of my blogs seemed to strike a chord. A friend called me first thing in the morning and excitedly said, “You have thousands of likes on your new blog and they are increasing by the minute!” “That’s great,” I said. “But maybe the counter is broken!” So, with a little bounce in my step, I headed over to my computer and sure enough, the “likes” were on a roll. Cool, I thought. After all, who doesn’t like to be liked? Although some may refer to us as the Like Generation, wanting approval is nothing new. It’s human nature… Continue reading

Nicola talks to Sherry Gaba about her new course “Breaking Free From Your Enabling Roles (podcast)

“We need to learn to stick to our boundaries and not bend” Sign up for Sherry Gabas Course HERE Sherry Gaba, LCSW  is a Psychotherapist, Life Coach, and Certified Recovery Coach specializing in individual, couples, family, and group psychotherapy and maintains a private practice in Westlake Village, CA, as well as providing phone and skype appointments. – See more at her website HERE Her new course aims to help those who love an addict or alcoholic, to more deeply understand enabling behaviors, how it harms the addict in the long run and how to stop enabling and build solid boundaries.  Step back and regroup. Start shifting your behavior and making positive changes.  A two-part virtual workshop exclusively for enablers and codependents.  January 25 and February 1, 2017 Participate from anywhere in the world via your computer. Attend live (the most effective way to get real live support) or listen to the replays.… Continue reading