Friends With Benefits – No Thanks! by Karina Shubaly

My journey with creating healthy sexual relationships started about 5 years ago. I found myself yet again, wailing to my brother in law, the tale of another infatuation gone awry. I refer to my brother in law as Saint Monica; the saint of Patience!  We talked about the idea of me writing a comedic and poignant book about surviving addictive relationships (past, present and future). I certainly had enough potential comedic material to fill that book and another, through the assorted pseudo relationships I had since leaving my husband. Recently I found myself, once again, spinning faster than a whirling dervish or Tasmanian Devil. It was crazy. I found myself angry, sad and joyous all at the same time. When a friend hit an “ouchie” yesterday, the tears quietly and openly fell. There were shared moments of laughter with friends; the kind of laughter that hurts your belly and you can… Continue reading

No More Notches On Your Bedpost – Valuing Your Female Sexuality in Recovery

Entering any new situation in life can be uncomfortable. We are so used to doing things in a certain way, that changing our mode of behavior to one we are not familiar with, feels like we are floating in open water with no life buoy. Some of the greatest examples of this can be seen in early recovery – or recovery in general for some. We often carry our old ways with us into new situations, only to discover old behaviors don’t serve us and are not appropriate nor needed any longer. So you just walked out of the bars and clubs and into a 12 step meeting or another program for your specific drug of choice. You’re used to being hit on, valued for the size of your breasts and shape of your ass. You’ve become accustomed to the cheap, meaningless compliments from guys, who use the word baby… Continue reading