• Past Articles

What’s Love Got To Do With It? – By Kyczy Hawk

If you remember the famous Tina Turner song, you remember the refrain: “What’s love but a second hand emotion.” That is the way it used to be. I loved you if my needs, thrills, cravings, or wants were being met. I didn’t see YOU, I saw my desires. I was loving the “if…then” experience, not the person. The second side to that was: “I loved me if you loved me.” I was not able to see me as a whole being in and of myself. I was lovable or acceptable if you saw me so; I was good if I was productive and did good things, I was bad if I was idle or when I did badly or poorly. It was all out there and not in here, in the heart of me. The way I didn’t see into the heart of “him” (except when defending or justifying a… Continue reading

Retiring The Monkey

With a pending DWI and a nudge from the judge, I rushed into my 1st 12 step meeting – late. I had intended to get there on time, but my mind had other plans, as usual. Being responsible, considerate of others or punctual wasn’t my forte. Over the years, since my introduction to the program, I tried every way under the sun to stay sober – my way – only to meet with total failure by returning to drinking, isolation and, in the end, shaking my head and asking myself, “What happened?” Today, I’ve not only arrived at a place where I’m sober from alcohol, for 1 year now but I’m sober mentally and emotionally, as well, because I continue to grow along spiritual lines. Putting the plug in the jug, going to meetings, working the steps with a sponsor, reading recovery related material and thanking God throughout the day… Continue reading

InTheRooms.com – Where The World Joins Together In Recovery

There was a time when my recovery was confined to 12 step meetings in my own home group in my own little town, in my own corner of the world. That corner of the world would be Ireland, for those of you who have no idea who I am. Initially I didn’t really notice that the recovery rooms I frequented were full of the same faces with the same stories day after day. So eager was I to “get it” that I spent every ounce of energy I possessed soaking up what all these remarkable people had to say. What I heard was solid, unwavering recovery at its very best. I am blessed with my recovery fellowship and my first introduction to 12 step programs was so spiritually based that it has enabled me to end my love affair with every self sabotaging behavior – except for drinking too much… Continue reading

My Love Story – Yoga & Recovery

What it used to be like, what happened and what it is like now is the traditional framework for sharing at a meeting. This progression holds true for both my recovery and my yoga practice. At one point my life was consumed by suffering which eventually became overwhelming. I had a life changing experience and chose a different path. Let me give you some of the details of my journey. I was what is termed as a garbage girl ­ I used anything and everything. I used chemical substances including alcohol in combination, I used alone, I used them with other people – I’d take anything, anywhere, anytime. I exhausted my internal resources to cope with that lifestyle. About the same time I ran out of other resources too: money, friends, family, work, health and the will to live. Having hit my lowest point, somehow I managed to have a… Continue reading

For Women Only; Aging, Hormones and Yoga – By Kyczy Hawk

I treasure my recovery. I love the calm and finding moments of serenity in each day. In early recovery I used to think that a life without chaos would be boring. I was worried that without the ups and downs of crises and resolution, relationships that were no longer based on F&F (you know what that is), an emotional landscape that was no longer out of control would mean that I was no longer vital, that I was living a mundane, dull and uninteresting life. I discovered that calm was enjoyable and contentment did not equal a colorless life. In fact I discovered that I did not have to contribute to the insanity of life; life would present me with adequate challenges, thank you very much. The principles of recovery would see me through with equanimity. I have been lucky enough to have gotten clean and sober in my early… Continue reading