My Very First Meeting – By Alana Haase

I had mentioned some time ago, that I would post about my first twelve step meeting. I’ve gotten a lot of requests to tell on myself since then. My behavior is a source of hilarity to me NOW but at the time… Well, let’s just say I was a little bit nuclear bomb angry, fearful and living in a cloud of constant anxiety. I did not go to that meeting of my own free will. One of my dearest friends had finally grabbed me by both shoulders and told me, “If you do not go to that meeting tonight I will come get you, duct tape your fanny to the bumper of my car and DRAG you there!” I could tell by the flashing of her brilliant blue eyes that she meant business. She was done with the never-ending nonsense caused by the chaos in my life. Her knee’s were… Continue reading

Groundhog Day: The Same Actions, The Same Results – By Jackie Stein

In the movie “Groundhog Day” Bill Murray’s character is an arrogant self-centered and selfish  weatherman who goes to Gobbler’s Knob one February 2nd to witness Punxsutawney Phil see his shadow and predict six more weeks of winter. For reasons that are not clear at the beginning of the movie, the character is destined to repeat that day over and over again, each day beginning with his radio coming on to the sound of Sonny & Cher singing “I Got You Babe” and the local radio jockeys making silly comments. In the course of the movie, each time he awakens, he begins to make modest changes in his day and each day gets a little better. By the end of the movie, he has become a changed man, no longer selfish and self-centered, caring more about others and repetition stops…and it is February 3rd. In the rooms of recovery, insanity is… Continue reading

Taking A Look At Our Familial Communication – By Jackie Stein, Family Recovery Life Coach

As we start the New Year, I’ve begun thinking of ways we can refine and develop our family communication skills. Communication is the method we use to exchange information. In the family unit, it can be between partners, between parents and children and between children. Communication can be with words but can also be with gestures and/or behavior. When we communicate using gestures or behavior alone, sometimes signals get crossed, because personal perceptions are overlaid. Think of your reaction when you say something and your partner or child rolls his or her eyes. What they are “saying” and what you are “hearing” may not be the same thing. By the same token, written communication is often misconstrued as well. Think about the recent phenomenon of text messaging and tweeting. Use of just words and no intonation allows the message recipient to spin the language based upon how they hear internally… Continue reading

When You’re The Scapegoat In A Toxic Family Of Origin – By Marty Jones

It happened again! The perpetual cycle of me allowing my mother to get close to me, then tearing me apart, me forgiving and learning to trust her again….and round and round we go. To say it’s exhausting and degrading and soul destroying is quite the understatement. And to allow myself to stay in this cycle is even more soul destroying. I’ve worked far too hard and far too deeply on myself to be okay with continuing to be part of my own systematic abuse. So, I’ve decided once and for all to support myself fully, stop denying what is happening and detach from my family. I come from a dysfunctional home (who doesn’t?) where my father drank and womanised all his life. My mother tried to cover it up and put on a show for the rest of the world and was enabled to do so by her own family….because… Continue reading

The view from Rock Bottom and How to Change It – Alana Haase

What is Rock Bottom? The Urban Dictionary defines it as: “A state of being wherein you feel as though you cannot sink any lower emotionally, psychologically or physically. My view from rock bottom was cream colored linoleum with beige flecks in it. It was the floor in my bathroom and I was lying face down looking at it through swollen eyes. When my hysterical crying finally stopped and I could take a breath I studied the floor very carefully. I remember feeling shocked at how ugly the floor was from this view. When I was able to stand I looked in the mirror at a complete stranger. Long tangled dark hair, matted in area’s with mucous from the crying. Red eyes so swollen my view was distorted, pale blotchy skin and lips. I stared in horror at this version of myself and heard a deep voice speak directly into my spirit,… Continue reading