Rigorous Honesty: The Key to Healing an Addiction-Damaged Relationship By Robert Weiss LCSW, CSAT-S

As addicts, we damage our relationships. And sadly, the more important a relationship is to us, the more damage we tend to do. Once we enter recovery, beyond the work of staying sober and pulling our lives back together in a general way, a primary goal for many of us is healing our damaged connections—especially with our spouses and partners. Most of the time, the most significant and painful damage, in the minds of our loved ones, involves the loss of relationship trust. As addicts, we lie, we keep secrets, we manipulate, we gaslight, and we just plain violate every aspect of relationship trust. These behaviors are part of the denial of our addiction. We lie to and keep secrets from ourselves and everyone else as a way of protecting (and continuing) our addictive behavior. Much of the time, we’re not even aware that we’re doing this. Our lack of… Continue reading

If You Want To Be Honest Keep Seeking – By Nicola O’Hanlon

It is my experience that we can only be as honest and truthful as the limits of our knowledge and experience allows us to be. Richard Phillips Feynman, an American theoretical physicist said “It is impossible to find an answer which someday will not be found to be wrong.” Oh how many times has this rang true for me. When I reflect on my 41 years and 9 months on this planet the contradictions I unearthed in some of my deepest belief systems at certain points in my life, have been quite phenomenal. Once upon a time I believed that the Adam and Eve story was a real actual event. Naturally being raised in a Christian society you’re told that the Bible is the word of God and so you accept it. I raised my 10 year old eyebrow to the moon in disgust, when I discovered that this was a… Continue reading