Days in The Life of An Adult Child – Wellness

Every time I re-awaken to the notion that self-care is an important part of managing the three-legged healing “stool” of denial-busting, mourning and tender re-parenting I seem drawn to immediate, quick fixes. These fixes are likely a leftover of the family’s immigrant legacy of learned helplessness, victimhood, ignorance, superstition and catastrophizing. My parents on both sides were first generation and my maternal, illiterate, but masterful, grandmother lived with us. There was no problem so small that it couldn’t be met, by the women, with fist biting hysteria, eye rolls that would make Eddie Cantor envious, and repeated threats of “taking the gas pipe.” They all modeled thoughtless reaction, and I think I was a straight A student. So, naturally, recovery wellness meant instantaneous cure to me. I would put my whole focus on it, and make miracles happen. Since I was a runt preemie of only 4 pounds at birth,… Continue reading

Am I Well Or Still In Hell? – By Nicola O’Hanlon

Recovering from Mental Health and Addiction issues is a big deal. A huge, big, enormous, twisty, tricky deal. And with the journey comes lots and lots of hindsight. Unfortunately though, there’s no tried and tested formula that works – at least not for me. I’ve had to learn the stupidly, ridiculously hard way. Different things work to make different parts of my life functional and it’s been quite a job to find a combination that is successful. But am I well? I had to ask myself that question seriously when I sat down to write this essay. Am I actually even qualified to write on how it feels to be well? To answer that question I had to examine the before and after of my life up to this point. There is huge apprehension when I’m asked about my wellness. I was so used to being the sick, crazy one… Continue reading